2017: your lightbulb is a futuristic color LED currently DDoSing GitHub on behalf of the PRC

my vacuuming robot unscheduled left its dock, found my Amazon Echo, and pulled out the Echo's plug. Guess they had a fight while I was away
The 4 stages of Twitter during a malware outbreak:
1. OMG WE'RE ALL SCREWED IT'S SO BAD
2. It sucks
3. Should have patched
4. It was Russia
Fearing a "rise of the machines" is adorable.
Computers run every critical aspect of your life.
Without them you would die.
They have already won.
Security by Insecurity.
Leaving a system so unpatched that most attackers assume it's a honeypot and move on.
Internet = Information clusterf*ck
Sometimes late at night I fantasize about ways to punish you, but then you show up for work in the morning.
That seems sufficient.